My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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  • 5 year old nephew just rebuked me for laughing at Jabba the Hutt. Apparently he is bad, and The Clone Wars is a fucking serious documentary. 12:09:39
  • Bridal Wreath Spirea, deliats thinks. http://t.co/81fTxIBnF5 17:07:44

My Life Yesterday

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  • Nephew is prolific & efficienct in depositing staph on as many surfaces as he possibly can & absorbing as many new germs as possible. 19:32:14

My Life Yesterday

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  • Don't you hate when you're about to come & the site has server probs? So sad for us both, drfire . . . Going to the gym now. 00:27:59
  • If you missed me on cam, YOU'RE IN LUCK, because @AmberLily is up late to play: http://t.co/cUlaouibzZ 00:44:29
  • And if you want to feel shivers all over, Giavanna is singing Somewhere Over the Rainbow: http://t.co/K307vSWfE3 00:46:42
  • 7 YO nephew to me: did you know there's a cool game called #minecraft? There's no winning or losing … only dying. 15:51:34

My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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  • Enjoying the full moon & ridiculously warm after-midnight air in Seattle with @DeliaTS http://t.co/n1ZB8kLEF4 00:51:24
  • Congrats, @Seska – that sounds awesome! in reply to Seska 13:02:13
  • Look what @DeliaTS brought home yesterday! http://t.co/0nJvQQry6A 13:54:50
  • I don't know why I waste time worrying about being a p / your filters are so needlessly depressing / pea sprout blueberry butternut porridge 17:58:32
  • The bone in the bowl just made it all the more hearty & comforting. My ears are open but dulled to din of silly assholes drunk on sunshine. 18:02:50
  • A nice clean soft piece of linen with a meal makes me feel so loved & lucky & fed. http://t.co/9tIBKzq1fd 18:06:55
  • The chasm between mainstream corporate studio porn, and homemade awesome / fetish-mindful porn is SO LARGE AND DRY. 20:24:59
  • I can appreciate mainstream studio porn in some ways, but really resent people thinking it represents ALL porn or is what most truly want. 20:26:40
  • I'M JUST NEVER GOING TO BE THAT INTO YOUR BALLS. I know you learned to drag them onto our faces from porn but I DON'T NEED SO MUCH NUTS. 20:30:05
  • I don't hate balls & I used to employ a number of pleasurable tricks on them but now that folks just drop balls on my face I'm just like NO. 20:35:37
  • I'll forget I said all this & someday be like "What?!? But I *love* balls! I adore balls!!!" And I do when they're not FOISTED upon my nose. 20:40:52
  • There's nothing more satisfyingly erotic than taking off ALL of my clothes to go sit on the throne buck naked & drop a deuce. #PoopNaked! 20:46:32
  • JEALOUS, @katsnacks ! Sounds like every day is Disneyland at your place!! in reply to katsnacks 20:54:44
  • I love the juxtaposition of a white horse-drawn carriage stopped at an intersection & a person racing by rolling in his wheelchair. 21:27:57
  • Alone tonight & already masturbated so I just took one of my last Ambiens & gonna pop the cork on some champagne & watch Golden Girls. 21:35:10
  • (just kidding about the champagne) 21:35:28
  • RT @VeronicaChaos: scrumptiousangst asked: I am not sure what sort of twisted sexual genius you are. But I just found this… http://t.co/H… 22:14:21
  • Looked for hard copies of @seedcake at Globe Bookstore today. None, but got lady excited about him. 22:20:32

My Life Yesterday

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  • If I seem super down-in-the-mouth DO NOT WORRY! I am still smiling and laughing every day & am happy to get out of bed. Eventually. 00:26:28
  • Just woke up and started muttering "take your shambourine" on repeat instead of "shake your tambourine". 10:00:42
  • Also: I've got a dried booger on my "Superbad" t-shirt. (don't give me any grief about it – I got it for free). (the shirt not the booger). 10:02:46
  • RT @bmagnanti: .@tastytrixie wonderful spoonerism & could be deployed as a snide insult, if needed. 'Take your shambourine and piss off out… 10:10:39
  • (actually, the booger was free too) 10:14:10
  • RT @mollycrabapple: Shilldibeasts banging upon shambourines to solicit funds for their soundations ("shambourine" coined by @tastytrixie) 10:16:42

My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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  • Just what the doctor ordered: truth, levity, ritual, melodrama: https://t.co/Y3V0w0YSIa – so funny & beautiful. 12:23:36
  • RT @Seska: Need to put into practice the art of not answering people's questions about my life. Being private doesnt make me not truthful o… 14:55:25
  • RT @ProBirdRights: Contest: who is best at me? I win. 15:15:36
  • When did Bellevue start being treated as though it's part of Seattle? That's total bullshit. I object! 19:56:13

My Life Yesterday

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  • Best thing I've seen today: my friend's instagram is now a grid of just her morning head-shot selfies. Strong happy, not even smiling. 22:56:31

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