My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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  • Exhausted. Having an anxiety attack. Rocking back & forth. I thought mid-life crises were supposed to he funny. 03:09:10
  • Oh right. This IS funny. Just not to me.

    OMG my pubes are turning grey. I don't want to die alone. LOL LOL LOL LOL LOL ad insanitisum. 03:11:24

  • Oh my god please help me!

    …and by "god" I mean "hitachi magic wand", of course. 03:37:32

  • Does an "nn" preceding someone's name on a dating site stand for "never-nude"? 03:41:23
  • You should be fined a thousand dollars every time your Mercedes, BMW, Range Rover, etc. car alarm goes off on the ferry. Fucking fuckheads. 11:47:11
  • RT @juliastockings: I'm also available this afternoon for one on one webcam – http://t.co/AfSBe3F47y http://t.co/qrzceCyjxx 13:23:40
  • There's a HUGE difference between an account used to PROCESS payments & a personal account where you deposit earnings & pay bills. NOT SAME. 14:33:22
  • Niiiiice & content after sweaty fuck with @DeliaTS … here are some camera phone pics: http://t.co/tOmhGbodhC 23:47:14

My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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  • I'm totally alive, just hunkered down multi-tasking on work things that do not inspire interesting tweets. Also: just feeling quiet. 00:16:27
  • RT @SpecAgntDCooper: The Great Northern doesn't have cable, but it does have this strange channel that once you turn on you forget what you… 02:39:02
  • Oh my word – HAPPY YUM – best accent & #GiantAreolas http://t.co/Tqj71A0ObF 09:39:41
  • Wow. WOW. It's not just her accent, but what she says & how she says it. Priceless, naughty & sweet: http://t.co/Tqj71A0ObF 09:46:27
  • Going to try to get another hour or two of sleep…hope I dream of her & diamond bananas & orgies in the sun w/a soundtrack of her voice. 09:51:44
  • I can't go back to sleep now. Not after that #poop that reminded me of a mini version of the turnip baby from Pan's Labyrinth. 10:17:19
  • Always amazed how profoundly happier & better I feel when I don't overeat or eat junk. Ridiculous that I forget this. 11:21:25
  • TOMORROW at 4 pacific I'm bringing back the DORK DANCE for our members: http://t.co/XSqQ7aEgza – not a lot of chat; it's going to be SILLY! 14:31:30
  • While my desire for partnered sex has been low lately, my desire for efficient solo vibrating porn-fueled sex has been HIGH HIGH HIGH. 15:06:29
  • So yeah, I just had to have an orgasm before lunch. Aaaaand my chai should be done brewing now. 15:08:07
  • RT @AmberLily: The Princess is now LIVE on @Streamate. Cum find me for a Star Warsy good time! http://t.co/9jqavggeAZ 23:15:02
  • RT @AmberLily: Out of private now & am about to run another Princess AmberLeia #GoldShow! Rebel Alliance needs more dough, yo! http://t.co/… 23:15:26

My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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My Life Yesterday

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